If you’re like other guys, and just coming out of a relationship, or just not sure how to approach a woman you think is attractive. Worry no more. If you really want to be confident with women, all you need to do is follow a few simple steps. Three simple steps, that’s.
Step 1) Make eye contact.
Eye contact, as they say, is a two-dimensional flirting technique. It’s something you do on your phone, with your friends, and even more so when you want to, to see if she’s interested in you. Now, as soon as you see that she is interested in you, look right into her eyes. She’ll get the message.
Step 2) Make a connection.
This isn’t the place where you launch into a discussion about the state of your relationship. A good conversation, according to the experts, is a two-way exchange of information. It’s an informal conversation, but it’s still a conversation. Avoiding topics you know nothing about like the location of her apartment, her favorite ice cream, or why her ex cheated on her.
Keep the conversation casual, find things you both have in common, and build upon that. You can ask her about how she is: is she someone who works at the hospital? What was she like as a kid? Ask her a question about what she enjoys doing – if she is outdoors, ask her about the place where she enjoys going.
Keep the conversation light and upbeat. Now, if you find yourself in a conversation with her that has the potential to turn into an interview, realize the mistake of taking that to mean that she doesn’t want to talk to you. She probably just hasn’t manufactured the curiosity. Consider it as her behavior code of letting you know that you’re interesting enough to sit down and talk. She’s not interested, but perhaps just curious.
Step 3) Let her know why she’s important.
What makes her special? What makes her set you apart from every other guy she might be dating? Find what is beyond what she’s said, that makes your relationship important. The most trivial things matter. What does she like to do when she’s not working? Does she have a pet? What’s the craziest thing she’s ever done? These are the perils of asking a girl out. The trick is to ask her in a way that makes her feel good about herself, and about the situation.
Don’t send mixed messages – she probably has guys breaking up with her every day, asking her the same questions and not getting an intelligible answer. There’s probably a good reason she’s single. There’s a reason she’s not taking any calls. Make her feel special.
Keep it short. There’s no need to give her an abbreviated version of your life. Tell her what you do for a living, where you were born, what your dream is, where you grew up, etc. But don’t tell her everything. Just enough to pique her interest in you.
One more tip about what to say to a girl you just met: use screen names. Pull on it – it will reveal you a little more to her. Most people don’t reveal too much about themselves in the first conversation. That gets old after awhile. It’s like a movie opening. There’s a reason they’re called first dates – they’re supposed to be mysterious and elusive. But be creative in your own way. Women love mysterious men, so there’s no harm in showing her that too.